Friday the 13th

I woke up yesterday morning with an ominous feeling and then I remembered that it was Friday the 13th and that it was just the superstition associated with the day. I remember one time when I was younger, I fretted about Friday the 13th and my mother reminded me that we are Puerto Rican and that it's actually Tuesday the 13th that is the ominous day for us. So, I laughed off the eerie feeling yesterday morning and got dressed; making a point to outfit myself in non-black clothing and just have a good day. I was getting my eye-brows done after work, so how could the day go wrong?!?

My work day went on without a hitch. I found out that Tim Russert died, which was insanely shocking to me. He was my one news solace after I lost David Bloom. Tim Russert always asked great questions and made people think. My Sunday mornings will be different without him. I figured that his passing was a sign that I shouldn't get too attached to news reporters and that this was the bad part of this particular Friday the 13th.

When I woke up this morning, I found my phone had somehow turned itself off last night. I figured that before Bible study, I had better check my messages. I had two messages that were spaced about 30 minutes apart - one from my mother and one from Karen, my wedding planner. Both had an urgent tone. Karen had mentioned that she wanted to talk about my wedding dress shop. My mom's was vague. I called Karen back figuring that one of her poor brides had a terrible incident and needed a good bridal shop. Since there were no subsequent messages from my mother or other family members, I figured it was just my imagination about my mother being panicked. I would call her later, I decided.

Like an understanding bride with a wonderful dress waiting for her, I could not let one of my peers spend another minute without a great dress shop. I broke my phone call rule (all calls between 10am and 10pm) and got a hold of Karen on her cell phone and that's when Karen broke the news.

I am the bride with no dress.

Apparently, on last night's news, during a follow up about another bridal shop that closed its doors in a nearby town, the station announced that my bridal shop had also closed its doors. My dress, fully paid for, would not be worn on my wedding day.

Oddly enough, I am not stressed about it. I know, it's very un-bride like, or even Dagnes-like, for that matter. The dress, typically, isn't just any dress for brides. It's the dress. The piece that the entire wedding is designed around. It sets the tone of the wedding. It's the dreamy part of the wedding; the fantasy made real. For me, it was just another element of the wedding. As I told Karen this morning at our cake appointment, what matters is John. If he's there, then I'm okay.

I thought, when I put down the full amount of the dress, that I was making life easier for myself. That I was spreading out the cost of the wedding and allowing for some financial breathing room. I figured it would be one less cost to keep track of and it would allow Erica Gerlach to order all of her materials without any problem. Apparently, there was a problem. Unfortunately, I was not personally made aware of this by Erica or any of her personnel.

On the other side, I have a lot to be thankful for. Here's my Pollyanna spin:

• I purchased my dress with a credit card and my mother has already contacted them to start the proceedings to get the charges reversed (Not only is there a strong chance I'll get my money back, but my mom is handling the arduous task!).
• I don't have a wedding party, so I was the only person in my wedding that was financially hurt by this situation and I only need to find one replacement dress.
• I didn't buy my accessories yet; the undergarments, shoes, jewelry, and little handbag that I want to perfectly match my dress. They are still out there waiting to be found.
• Karen has already sent me a list of reputable shops that I could get my new dress from.
• I may be able to find a dress that works better with August weather or one that is more like the dress I fell in love with in a Martha Stewart wedding magazine.
• I may find a more casual dress that won't require John to wear a tux and then he will have a suit that he can wear in the future.
• I get to go wedding dress shopping again! One of my aunts will be in town next week and my mom and I wanted to find a way to include her in some wedding details and now we were given this opportunity.
• And most importantly, I have 8 weeks before the wedding.
  

Eight weeks is plenty of time to get a last minute dress. It may not be perfect, but it will keep me covered. Perhaps I can meet with another couture shop and get a dress made. Most likely, I will get an off the rack dress or go back to Dream Weddings and rent a gown. Whatever the case, time is on my side.

These are the facts that have comforted me throughout the day. I have meditated on them while we walked about the mini mall of Woodland and our happy toy store, Costco. I meandered about and came across a wedding magazine and a sad feeling washed over me as I stared at the cover.

I suddenly realised here I am a bride with no bridal dress. That's about as sad as a lost puppy. And I've been playing this all wrong: I should act more grieved. I could get away with so much right now! I could have my feet rubbed and chocolate cake fed to me intravenously. Everyone would forgive the insane requests. "She has no dress!" they would whisper amongst themselves as they decided which of my favorite meals would need to be cooked. Oh man! I have had the wrong reaction to this situation.

Seriously, though, the sad part is that there are brides out there that are getting married in a few weeks. They designed their dream dresses with Erica and their hopes are completely shattered. Their whole bridal party was to be dressed in one-of-a-kind gowns and now they have the painful task of finding something else to wear. Most likely, nothing will add up to what they hoped for or dreamed of, but hopefully, these brides will have a wonderful support staff - a groom who can make their worries go away, moms who will rally their spirits and organize new shopping trips, and planners and friends who have encouraging words.

I have told Karen more than once that I am determined to not get stressed over the details of the wedding. I guess I got to prove that to her through this situation. This was an excellent way for me to be able reaffirm that for myself as well. Oh, that Pollyanna spin!

The great part about this situation is that I found out how much a person of prayer Karen is. I have several people in my life that I pray with. I also know of a few that pray over me and the details of my life, but I never suspected that Karen was also praying over the details of my wedding. That makes me feel pretty special.

If you know of any local shops or tailors, please let me know. Apparently, I'm in the market for a new dress.