Angelica and I were able to meet up for dinner last night and, as always, we had a super long gab session. Of course, we hadn't seen each other for about 2 months, so there was a lot to catch up on.
Angelica and I relate on so many levels, so it is so easy to open up and talk about the things that are going on in our lives. Our talks together tend to be very therapeutic for both of us. There's so much about her that I admire, but especially how fierce she is.
She's one of those people that is not afraid to take risks, to put herself out there, to try something new, and make no excuses for it. I am such a timid person, that I can't imagine living like that. There's a reason that I tend to win at the game "I've never" and that my high school Bible study group called me a goody two shoes. I am just not the fearless, self-confident type. I'm the timid one that apologizes for everything as though I were somehow to blame.
Last night, we were looking for a place to eat and ended up at KFC - to try the new grilled chicken. We stayed for over 3 hours chatting and during the course of our conversation, we talked about the fierceness that I admire so much in her. I don't know who was more surprised: Angelica for hearing that I thought she was fierce or me for how much Angelica doesn't see it. In my eyes, the girl is fierce. In hers, all that she sees is meekness.
I read once that what we admire in others is really our true selves begging to be unleashed; the part of ourselves that we desire to become.
We concluded that perhaps, because of my timid nature, my definition of fierce is much larger than the norm. Maybe I'll be the person in the nursing home whispering about that rebel Betty who ate a bowl of chili after 6pm. Who knows?
What I do know is that I admire her ability to at least try something new. To jump into a realm of unknown and give it a go. To find the areas in her life that seem to be dark and find the right dose of sunshine. She's willing to just try whereas I am often stunted by fear of the unknown.
When Natasha Richardson died, I had this moment of awakening. I was in the gym trying to make the most of my cardio and read the closed captioning of Larry King announcing her death. Here was a woman who was young, vivacious, well-loved, and had money and yet, was no different than the rest of us. A life cut short from something so simple. Floods of calls came in from fellow celebrities talking about this woman's life, her body of work, and the things that made her so special.
The common thread through all of these makeshift eulogies was that Natasha was someone who embraced life, that she was bold, unabashed. And of course, this caused me to take stock of my life. What could I do to erase the "Oh man, that freaks me out" from my arsenal of colloquialisms?
In that moment, I decided to live. To enjoy what I had in front of me and to make the most of what God had blessed me with. To venture out and try something new.
So, when we head out on our cruise, I'm doing several things that are WAY outside of my box of comfort: helicopter tour of a glacier, speed boat tour of a volcanic coast, and a zip line ride through some Alaskan rain forest. We had already booked these excursions before my resolution, but now I am embracing the idea of it all. I may scream, I may pee my pants from fear, but I'm going to do it and have fun. In the end, I'll be able to laugh about it. Well, not if I pee.
Angelica and I relate on so many levels, so it is so easy to open up and talk about the things that are going on in our lives. Our talks together tend to be very therapeutic for both of us. There's so much about her that I admire, but especially how fierce she is.
She's one of those people that is not afraid to take risks, to put herself out there, to try something new, and make no excuses for it. I am such a timid person, that I can't imagine living like that. There's a reason that I tend to win at the game "I've never" and that my high school Bible study group called me a goody two shoes. I am just not the fearless, self-confident type. I'm the timid one that apologizes for everything as though I were somehow to blame.
Last night, we were looking for a place to eat and ended up at KFC - to try the new grilled chicken. We stayed for over 3 hours chatting and during the course of our conversation, we talked about the fierceness that I admire so much in her. I don't know who was more surprised: Angelica for hearing that I thought she was fierce or me for how much Angelica doesn't see it. In my eyes, the girl is fierce. In hers, all that she sees is meekness.
I read once that what we admire in others is really our true selves begging to be unleashed; the part of ourselves that we desire to become.
We concluded that perhaps, because of my timid nature, my definition of fierce is much larger than the norm. Maybe I'll be the person in the nursing home whispering about that rebel Betty who ate a bowl of chili after 6pm. Who knows?
What I do know is that I admire her ability to at least try something new. To jump into a realm of unknown and give it a go. To find the areas in her life that seem to be dark and find the right dose of sunshine. She's willing to just try whereas I am often stunted by fear of the unknown.
When Natasha Richardson died, I had this moment of awakening. I was in the gym trying to make the most of my cardio and read the closed captioning of Larry King announcing her death. Here was a woman who was young, vivacious, well-loved, and had money and yet, was no different than the rest of us. A life cut short from something so simple. Floods of calls came in from fellow celebrities talking about this woman's life, her body of work, and the things that made her so special.
The common thread through all of these makeshift eulogies was that Natasha was someone who embraced life, that she was bold, unabashed. And of course, this caused me to take stock of my life. What could I do to erase the "Oh man, that freaks me out" from my arsenal of colloquialisms?
In that moment, I decided to live. To enjoy what I had in front of me and to make the most of what God had blessed me with. To venture out and try something new.
So, when we head out on our cruise, I'm doing several things that are WAY outside of my box of comfort: helicopter tour of a glacier, speed boat tour of a volcanic coast, and a zip line ride through some Alaskan rain forest. We had already booked these excursions before my resolution, but now I am embracing the idea of it all. I may scream, I may pee my pants from fear, but I'm going to do it and have fun. In the end, I'll be able to laugh about it. Well, not if I pee.
1 comment:
Sounds like you're gonna have a great time. And pee washes right out of clothes. :)
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